At some point, one needs to say the heck with DCYF, the courts, and even the kids they've spirited away from shellshocked parents and just get away from it all. Of course, that used to mean heading out to the local bar with darts and photos of cogno-intellectuals in tow. Of course, being in the Internet Age, today we just go web surfing and follow up on some of the bizarre links AltaVista suggested during the day.

This page will be repository of stuff our parents wouldn't have wanted us to see. And other stuff too, because I'm too lazy to make two pages today. If none of the links here offend you, please offer up some of your favorites. Warning - some of these links go to inoffensive pages! This page started out with only one URL that Paula wanted me to add to our site. She found it while looking into diaper rash as a form of child neglect. So I did and included several others that are worth hanging on to.

I might sort these someday, but I doubt I'll find any sort of sensible scheme that will work indefinitely.

We have a couple legal things to get out of the way first. Some of New Hampshire's dumb laws are on the WWW. Paula found a good source of lawyer jokes.

Paula's knee was pretty gross for a while after an operation to repair the anterior cruciate ligament. The band-aid covers the exit hole of the drill bit. The operation was made necessary during the demise of my first Saturn car. I wanted to put her knee right on this page, but Paula nixxed the idea. Maybe you can use it for a background scene.

Speaking of backgrounds, I've tried to make this page's background unobtrusive. Did you notice it features an opossum? Just how lazy can government employees be, anyway? Then there were some government employees who tried to apply cleverness to make a problem go away but wound up with a whale of a bad time instead. Yes, that whale.

Truck-dog-schnoodle Ella
hanging out at a favorite hangout

We're really not violent people at all. In fact, we think we have taste. We would never think of, say, cooking aliens OR social workers. But just in case you run into an alien, to cook, we know where to find alien recipes. If you have to cook FOR social workers, we recommend Recipes of the Damned, but note that feeding the leftovers to your kids (or even having the ingredients in your pantry) may result in child abuse charges.

The photo on the right isn't tasteless. It needs to be replaced.

I thought I lost a story about how ordinary folks can be dumb. This is very reminiscent of a lightweight pickup I saw break an axle under too great a load. There's now a similar version at In 2009, a VW Touareg and Tesla roadster were run into by a Prius, a car crash threesome that is likely unique before and after.

Even scientists kick off their shoes once in a while and check the fungal cultures between their toes. The mercurial home of the Annals of Improbable Research is home to research that cannot or should be be reproduced.

My car has a Darwin fish, so I guess I need a link to the Darwin Awards.

If a car can have a fish, what can a nose have?

What tasteless substance is found in fish and noses?

A good source of bizarre stories is Bizarre News. Click on archives.

Then there's this bizarre Body Farm. It's a good final resting place if you aren't into resting quietly. See also this CNN story, if it's still up. Paula hasn't made it there yet, as the Political Graveyard reports she is "still living as of 1998."

Don't go here! Javascript isn't necessarily your friend.

There's gotta be something gross over here.

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Contact Ric Werme or return to his home page.

Last updated 2007 November 19.